Old.

Forgive me, as I am feeling a little old tonight. Not in a bad way, just in an odd realization kind of way. A few days ago driving in my car I heard the Beatles song: "I've Just Seen a Face" and it really captured me. I can't quite explain it, but I wanted to cry hearing it. I had obviously heard it many times before, but this time it just sounded so simple, beautiful, and, well... old.

Tonight Julian and Nora were playing in the basement, Andrew was lounging with his Blackberry, and I started to look through a tote box of greeting cards and letters. I have saved every card and letter that I have ever received. I am not a hoarder, but for some reason I can't part with greeting cards and letters. I just feel that when someone takes the time to write something to me, it would be wrong to throw it in the garbage. I spent an hour reading letters my sister wrote to me in University, letters from girlfriends, love letters from boyfriends past, wedding invitations and greeting cards. My heart ached reading all of those beautiful, handwritten words. I am officially in that place where (I can't believe I have actually thought this, and am now going to write this): "I miss the good old days". The days when people WROTE to one another on pieces of paper, carefully folded and placed that paper in an envelope, addressed it, placed a stamp on it, and then patiently waited for the recipient to receive it, read it, and reply. My tote box of old letters and cards smells like a library book now. I love that smell.

Tomorrow John Lennon would have turned 70 years old. I remember when he died, I was 8 years old. I'm getting old, and I think I'm okay with it.

Look at how Yoko is looking at John in this photo. Isn't it beautiful? I guess getting old feels okay, as long as you can look at someone like this as they get old right along with you.

jbxo